Journal About Gratitude: Self-Care and Self-Indifference Day 1

Gratitude is real appreciation. I make it in the now - very present and very needed to recover from the hard knocks and hard times I experienced in Troy, New York.

Trying to brush off the idea that things had not gotten that bad to beginning to ask myself how this indifference clouded my vision of my current realtity.   Was this indifference a feeling or emotion that crept in soul, a little bit at a time causing decisions that where based on an attitude of indifference.  I sat and thought a minute, have things have become disordered because my decisions became focused away from important life goals.  Somehow I was lead somewhere I did not want to go, to a place where actions were out of alignment with a real vision of the original intentions I had in mind for my life.   

At home the signs were there, my roommate did not want to talk to me and started spending more time in bed - resting.  I spent my efforts trying to coach, advice, fix and help with the feelings in the home environment as a result of a lull that took over our lives.  When I called on the phone, there was silence on the other end of the line.  When we first met each other, his dreams where shattered by how this lull caused ill health.  He was bed-ridden for months, staying under cover during the cold months - hibernating for the winter.  

Despite this, I still wondered why the house was unkept, and why clutter was piled everywhere. The mess was something I felt I could conquer but I was only kidding myself.  After failed attempts at trying to connect to my roommate, I started a journey to recovery, looking for all the whys and hows to remedy my situation. Facing facts about failed my job search in which all the efforts of planning a career went out the window. My wallet was screaming feed me, instead of a much wanted income, we began collecting food on the free line.  

A trap was set where a free pile of really good food, was a temporary fix not a permanent fixture.  And feeding the unemployed fellows that spent their lifetime savings, or disabled people who unable to find their way into work.  As the years rolled by, this attractive habit of relying on free food, became a crutch.   Since time went by with less progress, I have reconsidered whether I could help with the clean up any situation including the renovation of this home. 

His silence was followed by a change in character.  A necessary review of what would open the doors of communication, collaboration and progress towards positive change.  I had a unwavering spirit where giving up was not part of my plan. This plan was about learning to work with impossible characters on impossible causes starts with self-care.

Self - care believing in a growth mindset starts by finding true appreciation for my life.  

Journal About Gratitude: No Agenda

One commitment to a focus on wellness included writing in a journal about gratitude.

The well know psychologist Laurie Santos is a professor at Yale who teaches a course on the science of wellness. Finding her course on Coursera, I took an audit since the topic was interesting to me.  Not withstanding I read Kelly's book on Happiness, and gave it a positive review.  The impact book had an impact on my life, I used it at home when I needed to help my roommate get out of a severe depression.  Somehow that smile was contagious - it caught on like fire.   I can't put down Santo's course on wellness, since the rewirements are an ongoing process leading to that goal of achieving overall wellbeing.  The book was free and the course was an audit but the time spent with it was more than I expected.  

Savor the experience - being present in the moment, and connecting to the experience.  I did it at the Diner in Brunswick NY. My roommate was enjoying his favorite dish - fish medley.  Just an attempt at enjoying my friend's company without much of an agenda. Since there was always an agenda for me, I made that small change which  I made the day one one I would always remember. 

Mountains of Money: Revolving Debt

Secured and unsecured debt. What do I need to know about making ordinary payments and money?

Having just taking credit cards for granted means taking for granted that I would always have a source of income to pay off the remaining balance.  Revolving credit allows for a balance at the end of the month since only a minimum payment is due.  Sometimes the balance accrues for individuals that end up without a job with a salary and benefits, or without a savings account that covers almost all of the expenses. Not taking positive actions leaves an in-debt person without the means of successfully resolving their fate of not having enough.  

Whipping out a credit card and making a payment without much thought or concern was just the way money works in the world of finance and business.  Then receiving the bill and making a payment without examining what was bought and how much was spent.  Falling into a debt cycle may require halting all activities that require a payment.  A typical example is the cost daily cup of coffee. Examining over a month to a year of what a coffee habit costs a consumer. 

In the world of finance the payment process is often an automated process designed to get what is due to the creditor's bank account.  First things first, using credit cards is not always a best choice since not everyone considers developing a set of personal finance skills one of their first priorities.  Priority means a daily record of expenses and income, a monthly budget and allocated spending plan.

As soon I graduated from engineering school, my sister set me up for my first credit card, an American Express card.  Oh boy, then there was a Discover card and a Fuel card and of course a Bank Visa card. My sister started her career by entering a college program in art and design.  She was interested in entering the world of fashion and started with an internship in Filene's in retail and fashion. After some deliberation she changed her career focus and switched to accounting. And at that time she was a female who entered a male dominated field by getting her CPA. 

Attending and participating in financial literacy workshops help convince me not to use credit cards, instead to buy with cash.  I finally understood that when I use my credit card I am taking out a short term loan. It is a debt I need to pay since I am using money that I do not have in my wallet or bank account. When I use my credit card, I am borrowing money from a creditor.  That is called a line of credit - a revolving debt.  The financial arrangement made with the creditor includes an set or variable interest rate which can effect the ability for someone to pay off the entire balance owed the creditor.

Using revolving debt to cover expenses while unemployed may lead to bankruptcy.

Journal About Gratitude: Success

 Currently, dealing with solving situations that seem impossible to resolve.  I have tried for a term and did not give in to the feelings that the would be no solution.  In an effort to move things (mountains) forward I started to take personal development courses online and one option was Coursera

The Coursera Success Course offered by Richard Shell, University of Pennsylvania is a brief examination intended to cover the issues and beliefs I hold about my personal and professional success.  The course provides a chance to think more about values, lifestyles, and achievements that form ideas and beliefs about what defines a successful life. The time spent on this exercise, and the effort seems like a luxury not a necessity.  Do I really have to move a mountain to get things done?

Family upbringing definitely shape personal views on success. Many cases, families live in different locations, distances that are not easy to travel.  Even years between visits and phone calls, have caused a separation.  Values and life experiences have changed individual family members. Sometimes these changes are difficult to understand

What about decision making and future planning.  Do cultural, and gender differences affect our productivity when working in pairs or teams? Is it possible that peer-support groups can help with finding solutions that help resolve these differences? Always the outcomes of these interactions can effect wellbeing, work environment or views on personal success.  

Of course - most would think that success and wellbeing are correlated.  

The reasons to study success are simply to create a more satisfying life, to figure what direction I will turn next, and develop a personal and professional plan for creating my overall successful life.

Is it all about happiness? some people think so.  Shifting your focus on engineering your life, designing your future and examining your present situation.   Starting with self-awareness , dissatisfaction, dealing with life's disappointments and preparing to make improvements when working with others.

Journaling about Sources of Cognitive Biases

 Decisions , Decisions and more Decisions!

Our decision making processes are biased by problems related to memory, attention and other mental mistakes.  These are unconscious decision-making processes that affect our ability to make sound decisions, without us realizing their effect on us. 

If we only have the ability to project into the future, to see the outcome of our decisions.  Let's just hope that decisions I today make a better future for my life and those around me.  

Problems with perception and memory, our memory bias affects our recall of past events, situations and perceptions of what really happened.  We may take a rosy outlook, which paints a different scene and how will that affect our decisions.  

Over time our life moves forward, we have changed.   More importantly, how do we correct memory bias, and what questions do we need to ask ourselves knowing our current attitudes, behaviors, moods or emotions will skew our recall of the past.  

“Most people, probably, are in doubt about certain matters ascribed to their past. They may have seen them, may have said them, done them, or they may only have dreamed or imagined they did so.” — William James.

Entering the situation room.  

Let's say the situation is the same but our resources are very different.  We may have gone bankrupt and have forgotten the had financial hardship of the past.  Possibly we have reverted back to a time and place when jobs available, not ever believing work would not be available.  Our view of the world is different since our prior situation was one filled an attitude of abundance since we had financial resources. 

Look we are human and we do not always make rational decisions , there are times we act compulsively.  Here is a mental problem , I can spend more time or more money that I can afford to spend.  Say for instance, I pulled out my credit card and charged the meal, not thinking that what I spent this month on entertainment was more than I could afford.  Or I spend more time solving problems that are not creating a better future for myself, and my life.  

Possibly we are not keeping an accurate account of our expenses or a detailed record of how we spend our time, and we make rash decisions believing we have more time and money that we actually do.  We need to correct our thinking and find solutions for our mental mistakes.  

Knowing that compulsive actions - which one example is compulsive spending generating problems that lead to financial distress or depression.  Not putting our attention on setting goals, instead taking actions that create a better future for ourselves.  Jump on the other side of the fence and state that saving money and managing our time is simply a decision we make when we put our attention and time on setting realistic goals that match the vision of our future. 

CHECK THE POLICE REPORT FOR FALSE STATEMENTS

FALSE Statements in a police report may change the verdict or opinion of the court.

The police report is easily obtained at the police station, records department.  Just stop in and say you need a copy of the police report. Get all the records before you go to court. Read them and research the law using the NOLO books in your public library.

Here is a lawyer that states they deal with false statements on a police report, has anyone had experience with this law firm? How to find out more information about a lawyer you are hiring to represent you in court?

 https://ialawny.businesshomepage.info/personal/criminal-defense/

What About Time Management? 5 Minutes of Planning for Change

 PLANNING IN ADVANCE

Start by planning the night  before for the next day

• Tools: Time Blocking 
• Tools: Signal Handling
• Tools: Controlling Interruptions
• Methods: Create a Process - Setup a System - Record Your Time
• Fail - Adjust and Proceed

REPEAT THE PROCESS

CREATING A LIST

• Create a List the Night Before
• Expect 25% Increase in Productivity
• Measure Results - Adjust and Repeat

GOAL 1:  Setup a Routine

• Plan the Next Day from Start to Finish
• Setup Standard Tasks and Assign Time Blocks
• Measure the Value of Being on Time with the Task
• Measure Improvements
• Set Deadlines and Meet them

GOAL 2:  Time equals Money

• Per Hour Worth is Crucial to Effective Time Management
• Get the Most out of your Time Investment
• Eventually you will Boost your Hourly Value

GOAL 3: Learn to Delegate

• Learn to Share the Responsibility - Engage Others in Activities
• Delegate Low Wage Tasks to Other Workers
• 1000% RETURN - SMART GOAL SETTING
• 1 Minute of Proper Planning - 10 Minutes of Execution
• Measure by Setting Standards

VALUE OF TIME

• With Proper Planning will create Improvements
• Value is $10,000 to $100,000 in one Year

WHAT YOU NEED

• Good Habits
• Good Organization
• Time to think through Planning Strategies
• Evaluation Skills

Think Big - Be Descriptive - Extend to Financial, Career and Personal Goals